Author: author

I’ve had quite a few questions about my new character so I thought I’d update y’all here.

He’s doing quite well, thank you! He’s been an inspiration to my story. And not just for me, my protagonist is learning from him as well. He’s helped her escape from a precarious position but he’s also pushed her to discover strength she didn’t know she had. He’s helping her to grow into a more powerful yet empathetic version of the person she thought she was.

In short, I love this guy! I’m so glad he forced his way into my story.

 I started thinking about the people in my life and how they have transformed me. Twenty-five years ago, God placed a man in my life, John Stokely, who not only accepted my eccentricities, but loved me all the more for them. I never thought I’d move away from the East Coast but by falling in love with a Naval Officer I was forced to see more of the United States than I ever thought I would.

Moving away from family and friends is difficult, but a wise woman (my mother-in-law) told me early on, “If you don’t cry when you leave a town, you’ve wasted your time there!” I vowed then that I wouldn’t waste my time, I’d explore every new duty station and make as many friends as I could.

That’s a difficult thing for a person like me. My friends don’t believe it, but I’m actually shy until I get very comfortable in a new situation. But God forced me out of my box with each move and I’m grateful for every one. Each new town, each new friend, gave me the opportunity to grow in ways I never would have dreamed of on my own.

So again I’m asking you to take a look around this week for the “stranger in the corner.” Who is it God might be placing in your life to help you grow? What new opportunity might force you out of your box? As Mr. Magorium said in his Magic Emporium (if you haven’t seen this movie, I recommend it), “Life is an occasion. Rise to it!”

The family and I just got back from a road trip to Hilton Head, SC. We took four days to drive out there with a day and 1/2 stop in Nashville to visit my aunt.  We spent six days in Hilton Head with eighteen people celebrating my in-laws 50th wedding anniversary and then drove the twenty hours home in two days. Here are some things I learned along the way.

1. Make sure to cross check the AAA reviews of hotels with other sources. And remember, there’s a VAST difference between 2, 3, and 4 star hotels! Ew…that’s all I have to say.

2. All McDonald’s are not alike. I won’t go into details for fear of prosecution but we stopped at one that gave us all the heeby jeebies!

3. A box of 50 munchkins (donut holes) from Dunkin Donuts will not last long in the back seat with two teenagers.

4. It is ALWAYS a good idea to get a second cup of coffee for later when you don’t know when you’ll see another Dunkin Donuts.

5. South Carolina is VERY humid. And just because it thunders doesn’t mean it will rain.

6. Hilton Head has a lot of traffic circles. And they all look the same. Really.  And, they can double as amusement park rides when you’re in the car with a bunch of crazy women! “Raise your arms and scream!”

7. After not having one in six years I can unequivocally say that Chik-Fil-A sandwiches still rock!!!

8. Eating at Paula Deen’s restaurant will make your tummy explode. She makes awesome fried chicken and her mac & cheese is to die for.

9. A glorious morning sunrise reveling in God’s presence can do wonders to restore your sanity after spending five days with eighteen people!

10. If you want to be happily married after fifty years make sure you marry your very best friend! What a blessing to celebrate Pat and Doug’s love and friendship. What a joy to be with siblings and cousins celebrating their twenty-plus year marriages! I’m looking forward to the 60th anniversary!

During my prayer time today I asked God for some encouragment. The writing life can be full of rejections and silences. It’s enough to drive a sane person crazy. So I prayed for a little good news.

And it came. No, I didn’t sell a story or get a call from my agent. But my niece sent me an e-mail telling me she’d finally gotten to read a copy of my first book, “Instead of Ashes.” She told me she couldn’t put it down.  Sigh. My heart beat a little faster. A smile came to my face. That one little e-mail meant so much. I marched up to my lap top, turned it on and started working on another story to send out.

Please don’t think I”m looking for anymore pats on the back this week, my “kudos tank” is full. But I got to thinking, who could I encourage?  Who can you?  Take a minute today and think about someone you might like to thank for being in your life or helping you with a problem and then jot them a note, an e-mail or give them a call. Sometimes we don’t realize what such a simple act can mean to someone.

Douglas Adams died last week. I remember reading Hitchiker’s Guide to the Galaxy in high school and loving it. Adams’s passing got me thinking about another book I read during that time, Illusions: Adventures of a Reluctant Messiah by Richard Bach.

To be honest, I can’t recall much about the storyline now. But one line a character spoke stuck with me. “Live your life so as never to be ashamed if something is published about you. Even if what is published isn’t true.” I remember memorizing that line at the time and thinking it was a great philosophy.

Think about it. In order to make that a reality, you would have to be secure in who you are, in everything you’ve done, and all that you’ve said over the years. I wish I could say I’d never made a mistake, said the wrong thing or made the wrong decision; I have. But I do feel I’ve stayed true to the person I want to be. I’m not perfect, far from it. But my mistakes were honest ones. And I’ve made fewer as I’ve gotten older. I’ve learned to take myself less seriously, to value others more than myself and to keep my mouth shut unless I know I’m adding something positive to the conversation (although this one I still struggle with!)

It’s interesting to think about in this day in age. With the media ready to pounce on anyone for any indiscretion, is there anything you would change about your life? Anything you wish you would have done differently? I wonder when our life is done here, will we be forced to watch those mistakes and see how they affected others? Perhaps that’s what God’s grace is all about. For now, on this side of things, I will continue to try and not be ashamed by anything I say or do, even if CNN decides to broadcast it!

I’ve spent the last two weeks caught up in the hoopla of my son’s graduation. Hard to believe the strapping young man who now towers over me was born seventeen years ago. Where does the time go?

I couldn’t help but think about all that’s happened in my life since my son’s birth. Happiness ebbs and flows. There seems to be no rhyme or reason to the events that mold us. In the past seventeen years I moved five times, twice across the country; I lost a child and fought depression; I gave birth to a daughter; my mom battled breast cancer and won; my brother disowned his family; aunts, uncles and cousins have passed away while nieces and nephews have been born.

Life’s not easy. My pastor’s recent teaching on Ecclesiastes has shown this to me in a new light. We can rack our brains trying to figure out what buttons to push in order to have a good life. What’s the secret formula? What products do I need to use or what car do I need to drive in order to be happy? What can I do to keep anything bad from happening to me or my family? The truth is there is no button. There’s nothing we can do or say, buy or use, that will give us the perfect life. Just in the last few months we’ve seen celebrities who seemed to have it all throw it away in search of something more.

I’ve made it my goal this year to live a better life. Not one of monetary success or fame, but one where the things I do and say matter more. I have to admit, I’m not doing the best job of it. I’ve let life sidetrack me. But watching my son cross the stage to receive his diploma the other night has spurred my desire again. I saw this young man my husband and I’d raised beaming with pride (and relief!) at his accomplishment and I wanted that joy for myself. What new skill can I learn this year? What fear can I overcome? What goal can I set and see attained? Just like the characters in one of my favorite movies, Second Hand Lions, when my time on earth is done I want people to think that I LIVED! I’m making plans my friends! I’ll let you know what happens!